confessions of an almost-1L

Anyway, I was just thinking about myself. Everyone has those times when she doubts her own worth and wonders if she's really good enough. Today, I keep wondering what about me makes me good enough to go to law school.. there are so many other people who seeem brighter and much more adept than I am, and yet they're not in the same position. Why? Or a better question: why not? If I deserve this, as people claim, then why don't those other people who have scads of info bits tucked away in their brains and think much more clearly and rationally than me?


I guess the world's just full of wonders that never cease.

Anyway, I've been doing internet research for tips on going to law school from people who have been where I'll be treading in about...5 weeks or so. I was nervous about college, but I knew I'd make it. Law school's a totally different ballgame, though. From the smartest selection of the most hardworking college students.. the cum laudes and the suma cum laudes, who were valedictorians and salutatorians in high school and who learned to read when they were 2 and 3.. these are the people I'll be up against, fighting tooth and nail to secure a coveted spot in the top 10% of my class. My grades are no longer dependent upon my own best work. In a way, that's hella scary, but in another way it's rather enlightening. It's all out of my hands. So all I can do is my best, as that's the only thing I can control.

In that sense, I guess I'm no longer really apprehensive about law school, just waiting for it all to begin. I want to open myself up to everything that this new experience has to offer. Before that all happens, though, I really need to get my life in order; namely, my living situation needs straightening out. I'm moving into the basement where I can have my own space and stuff, so.. I need to paint it and get carpeting for the floor and decorations and stuff. It's exciting, expensive, and time consuming to decorate a new place, man.